We all have the days of thinking we aren’t cut out for this parenting gig. Whether your kids are young, teenagers, or adults, feelings of failure just pop up every now and then. We get frustrated, lash out, wallow in parenting guilt, apologize, and tell ourselves we’ll be better next time. Or we have the days where we give the kids the easy meals (you know, cheerios in a baggy, PB&J, frozen chicken nuggets), and let them watch tv for way longer than we’re willing to admit. Maybe it’s just me, but I’m almost certain it’s not.
Or maybe your child(ren) are adults and you see them hurting, trying and failing, getting lost in things they shouldn’t, and you wonder if you did something wrong to allow this to happen. You think you should’ve prepared them better, that maybe if you did XY&Z, this wouldn’t have happened.
We just all feel like crappy parents sometimes.
My parents did a freaking amazing job at raising me and my six siblings. I’m honestly amazed when I think back to childhood and can now see troubles they faced, things that must have been so stressful to them, and yet I don’t remember once being stressed. I also remember the lazy days of snacks as meals and movie days. I remember my mom declaring game day over school (some of my favorite days) and we’d all be so excited. In reality though, I bet sometimes she just needed a break from me spelling the word “cooperate” wrong a dozen times or not understanding fractions for the life of me.
My point in that little snippet of my parents and siblings is that it reassures me that I know I have the best parents anyone could ask for since I know that things have never been perfect. There were off days, there have been dramatic, heart shattering things happen in my family. And I hope my parents never think they weren’t or aren’t good parents or that anything that has happened in our (my siblings and I) lives is due to their parenting, especially choices we made personally.
I look at this and try to give myself the same break. Life can be hard. Parenting can be hard. My kids are still young, and I’ll have many days ahead of feeling less than perfect, less than okay. There will be things I can’t foresee happen, there will be things that make me question everything. But I’m the best parent to my kids. You’re the best parent to yours. This parenting gig doesn’t come with a manual no matter how much we wish it did. We have these little humans to raise to the best of our ability. We have off days, they have off days.. But as long as we try our best, pour love into their hearts, speak hope and strength to them along with the truth they need, we are doing our best. You are doing your best. And if you’re my mom or anything like her, I guarantee you that’s enough. More than enough. Actually incredible and you’re kind of supermom.